The goal. Jessica could see it clearly, but unfortunately, she could also see a big obstacle between herself and the goal. Me. How do I get past her? she wondered.
Actually, this is an exercise I’ve done often in sessions on “Overcoming Obstacles.” I stick a GOAL sign on one participant, an OBSTACLE sign on myself, then tell the third person to try to get past me to her goal while the rest of the class watches. Women have tried to run to the right, then the left, through my legs, even around the room or under the table, but I’ve always blocked them. Sometimes a woman would get winded and quit.
This time was different and I was the one who learned the most from the exercise! Instead of instantly coming at me, Jessica stood in her place, thinking. Then she walked slowly and calmly toward me, placed both hands on my shoulders, and pulled a very surprised me closer, saying, “Let’s dance.” She guided me, turning me gently in a circle as we moved. When we stopped, she was on the side of her goal, with me behind her! I was nearly speechless.
“What just happened?” I asked the class. “Debi, you were here last time when Kimi tried to run me over. What was different this time?” Debi said, “Jessica embraced the obstacle, danced with it, and got where she wanted to go.” She didn’t treat the obstacle as her enemy, but simply as an impediment to be managed, not fought.
I’ve shared this story with several friends since it happened last week. Each has been as impressed as I am with Jessica’s approach and the lesson she taught all of us. Embrace the obstacle that comes between you and your goal. Manage it, dance with it. Then you, too, will reach your goal.
by Kathleen Vestal Logan, MS, MA June 4, 2018