Am I feeling the ‘holiday blues’? As my to-do list grows inches longer, I sense the increasing pressure, wondering, “How can I possibly get everything done?” Even our calamondin tree is full of ripe fruit, demanding that I make marmalade. Today!
It’s time, then, to remember that joy comes not to those who have the shortest to-do list, but to those who can pick and choose from the list, doing what’s most important and valued. If we don’t consciously encourage joy, we may instead succumb to the holiday blues or even depression.
What are the holiday blues? They’re a widely recognized form of stress, often experienced as an unusual level of sadness. They can occur when the holidays aren’t what we want them to be, when there’s a gap between our expectations and reality. I want our house to look like it belongs in Southern Living Magazine! I may think, for instance, despite lacking the means, time, or talent. That gap is where sadness and depression can slither in. Perhaps that example seems frivolous, so here’s another: Our son and his family were stationed in Japan for more than three years. How I yearned to celebrate Christmas with them! And we hadn’t even met our youngest granddaughter. My joy would have come from being with them, so, yes, I felt sad.
Who’s susceptible to the holiday blues? Those with pre-existing levels of sadness or anxiety; those already under stress (e.g., job loss, retirement, health issue); and people who have experienced change(s) in relationships (e.g., divorce, spouse’s military deployment, death). All of these can increase stress, threatening to suck the joy out of what ‘should’ be the happiest time of the year. Giving in to commercialization and consumption means that we rely less on our deeply-held values, too, as we try to ‘buy’ our way to joy.
What can we do to beat the holiday blues? Come back next Monday for useful ideas.
by Kathleen Vestal Logan, MS, MA November 28, 2017