After two decades of just the two of us in our home plus occasional guests, it has been a big adjustment to having a family of four move in with us. Never in my life have I consistently cooked dinner for six! Fortunately, they are all good eaters, which probably comes from living in some many different places. More than anything, it takes a commitment on everyone’s part to making this work. None of us can maintain our normal routines or impose unnecessary requirements on the others. Certainly, we had to make accommodations, such as storing breakable treasures.
Our son and daughter-in-law are careful to maintain parental boundaries, being responsible for the girls’ schedules and needs. They do not take advantage of us as babysitters. However, we are engaged and happy grandparents, reveling in the chance to build relationships with the girls.
Normally, money would be handled differently, with our son contributing equally to the increased expenses. However, he is working hard to build his new franchise, covering basic expenses with his military retirement and not even taking a paycheck from the business yet. As he says, “I’m reinvesting in the business for now.”
As for personal space, there isn’t much. They have the entire upstairs, and we have a huge porch with three separate sitting areas. The weather has been warm and inviting for outside time, too.
I think the most important thing we do is eat dinner together every night, holding hands and saying the blessing beforehand. If we forget, little Caroline says, “What about the blessing?”
There are bound to be some conflicts or times when each of us wishes for privacy. A quick walk around the block is an easy stress reliever. A sense of optimism and picturing future success helps, too.
With a positive attitude and sense of gratitude for the benefits we all receive, intergenerational living can and does work.