“‘Last Chance’ prom girl dies at 14 of illness” is the front page headline today. Born with Spinal Muscular Atrophy 2, an incurable and progressive disease that wracked her body, Jerika Bolen lived in constant pain. Of her own volition, and with the support of her loving mother, she chose to die rather than face increasingly intense pain and debilitation. She could only move her head and hands, so obviously never had a normal childhood. Instead, it was filled with treatments and surgeries, bed and a wheelchair. Somehow, though, she managed to live as fully as she could, rejoicing in the capabilities of others even as she was physically limited. She somehow managed to finish 8th grade, have fun, develop friendships, and indulge her love of music.
She never wavered after making her decision, but chose to live as fully as she could in her remaining summer. Her mother helped plan a prom for her called “J’s Last Dance.” Word got out and more than a thousand people showed up to wish her well and help her celebrate. A police escort added to her pleasure that night. I don’t think I’m exaggerating to say that millions read about her in various articles and online. Some were angry or upset with her mother for not fighting harder to prolong Jerika’s life; most were supportive. For me, the point is that Jerika lived the best life she could, never giving in or giving up. She cherished her days because she knew they were limited.
And the lesson for the rest of us? Don’t put off your life! Today is the only guaranteed day you have. So often I hear women say things like, “When my kids go to school, I’ll write the book in my head,” or, “When I retire, I’ll have time to exercise.” Why wait? Take time every day, even if only a few minutes, to indulge your interests or passions. I have a friend, a young mother with two daughters in elementary school and a full-time job, who still manages to write short articles for parents’ magazines. A book will follow, I’m sure. Another close friend who has developed Parkinson’s does therapy three times a week to maintain her strength and skills. A neighbor will be taking a three-week bike ride in the northeast soon with her husband. What is it that you want to do, to accomplish, to be? Nurture it today. Live as fully as you can every day.