You can either succumb to your fears and live with the consequences, or overcome them. But how? As promised last week, here are the first four of eight ways you can curtail them:
- Put your fear in perspective. Ask yourself: On a scale of one to ten, how intense is it? As Dr. Sam said, “I’ve failed at some pretty big things in the past, but did I die? No!” You can also ask, What’s the worst thing that can happen? followed by, What’s the best?
- Tolerate being uncomfortable. Let’s admit it – many of us would rather stay with the status quo than take a chance. However, doing nothing usually breeds regret or guilt anyway, so why not decide to endure the discomfort while you try something? When asked what fears she has about writing, Suzy admitted, “I fear that I’ll pour myself into writing, buck naked on the page, and no one will read it, or it will have no meaning for them if they do.”
- Separate what you do from who you are. As Dr. Sam explained, “My sense of being me was okay, even if I had qualms about the business itself.” Put another way, if you take a risk and it doesn’t work out, you are not a failure. Try something else.
- Do a risk-benefit analysis. Figure out, What’s the cost to me if I do nothing? then, If I do take action, what benefits might I gain? Decide which is bigger – the cost or the benefits. Suzy took the risk and now has a published book, as well as a growing number of readers for her blog. For Dr. Sam, “It took me an hour to drive to work. I was missing out on time with my girls, like taking them to volleyball practice and games.” She wanted more control over her life. Starting her own business has allowed that.
Come back again next week for the final four ways to overcome your fears.
by Kathleen Vestal Logan, MS, MA March 5, 2018